I'm gonna wash that man right outta my hair!!

That was my plan here in Bali (the "man" in question being India itself, sorry girls).  But said man, like the days worth of sweat, dirt, and god knows what else had been building up in my hair, was far more difficult to wash out than expected.  I'm in Ubud, and it's beautiful, but for the first few days I felt nothing.  I couldn't see any beauty, wasn't happy and missed India and everything about it.  I tried  shifting to a nicer hotel with a swimming pool and my own balcony facing the rice fields, but it was no better.  I thought of heading to the beach, or maybe to hike up the volcano, or even taking some sort of art class, but I couldn't seem to get it up about doing anything.  It was that familiar indifference of depression all over again.  Damn the stubborn heart!!

But I met a nice French girl, and we went on a lovely walk through the rice fields, and I've had some really nice food (loads of steamed veggies and peanut sauce and pastries!!!) and started reading Tom Robbins again (Fierce Invalids Home From Hot Climates) so things are getting better.

Yesterday, while sitting in a sweet organic coffee shop that makes it's own frozen yogurt, I met a crazy English artist who came to Bali for a few weeks, but that was three years ago!  I'm guessing she's in her 50's or 60s and looks like a stereotypical hippy artist, but we got to chatting and I came to learn that she's been volunteering at a community school for little kids on a small small  island that is rarely visited by tourists, Nusa Penida.  She invited me to go with her this time around, saying that the kids would love someone who is younger and American.  So she gave me instructions on how to get to the island (bus to a coastal town, then a boat to another island, and yet another boat to Penida) and how to find her (ask around for Suzy, I'm the only white woman there) if I decided to go.  There's no internet there, she says, so I'd have to just show up.

Then, today, at yet another sweet organic coffee shop, I met an Australian scientist/wildlife researcher/humanitarian/journalist/novelist who also has a background in pharmacology (yikes!) and had quite a long chat where twice I almost cried.  He's currently writing something about empathy, and I think it shows.  Either way, once he learned I was a pharmacist, he told me about a project he was involved in during a recent earthquake in Indonesia where he was able to acquire a warehouse full of medications and had the local know-how to get them to the people before any of the much needed foreign aid arrived.  He said he wished there had been a pharmacist there to sort through the drugs and make sense of it all.  This happens to be close to what I always imagined myself doing (pharmacy related international disaster relief type stuff) but haven't really found an organization by which to do so.  He gave me some contact people and said that it would be easy for me to start something up.  Just what I need, I thought, another reason to stay abroad. 

I have met too many expats here and I fear that I will become one of them.  What if I can't readjust to life in the States?!  I was so worried when I fist came about being unable to handle India and now I'm worried about being unable to handle the US!  Jeez, I'm going to be a mess when I get home!  My hair is getting dirtier and dirtier by the minute and I am going to need lots of help to wash all this nonsense out!

In the meantime, I will leave tomorrow morning to attempt to find the crazy lady and help out with the kids.  I guess one can never visit too many foreign schools, no?  Don't worry, I will make it home safe and, if I'm not too much of a mental case, I'll try to write about when I get back to Bali.